Choosing to live in the ‘Green R:’ The Reverse Mortgage Decision Nobody Talks About

I journal almost every morning; it’s my cadence to the row of life.

At the end of each journaling session, I ask myself a simple question: ‘Can I live in the Green R today?’

What is the Green R?

The Green R is to Respond, with equanimity, to anything and everything that will come my way.

The Green R is the opposite of the Red R, for the Red R is to React, often with judgement and scarcity.

Most conversations about reverse mortgage loans don’t start with numbers.They start with emotion.

People hear the term and might instantly move into what I call a Red R moment; that reactive place where fear, old stories, and worst-case scenarios take over.

And I get it. This is a big decision. It touches money, family, independence, aging, and legacy. Those topics can quickly stir up strong emotions.

But once we slow things down and talk through the real challenges someone is facing, there’s a shift. That shift is what I call the Green R, and it changes everything.

The Green R: Clarity, Calm, and Confidence

My favorite hobby is building relationships; learning what generates excitement and drives fear in others and encouraging commitment to the former and discard of the latter. In my career as a sales professional and leadership consultant, the Green R mindset where people make their best decisions:

✔ Clear

✔ Calm

✔ Open

✔ Curious

✔ Long-term focused

✔ Ready to evaluate real options

In the Green R, we respond, we do not react.

We look at what’s possible instead of what’s scary. We move toward solutions instead of away from them.

We commit to the discomfort that comes from a changing perspective, knowing the benefits will far outweigh the work.

The Red R: Where Some Reverse Mortgage Conversations Begin

The Red R is the opposite. It’s where fear lives, thrives, and is empowered.

The Red R sounds like:

• “I don’t want the bank taking my home.”

• “I heard these are dangerous.”

• “My kids won’t like this.”

• “This feels too complicated.”

• “I’m worried about running out of money.”

The Red R isn’t wrong, it’s human and it’s absolutely normal. It’s a place we’ve all been, be it for a moment or a month. It’s just not the place where good financial decisions get made.

My Goal Isn’t to Sell a Loan.

My goal is to move the conversation from the Red R to the Green R.

Recognize and remove the reaction and lead with the response.

Every conversation I have with a homeowner or advisor comes back to one goal:

Help them see their options clearly, without pressure or fear.

A reverse mortgage loan isn’t for everyone. But it is a powerful tool for many, especially when we look at them through a calm, strategic lens.

Because here’s the truth: People don’t make smart money decisions when they’re scared. They make smart money decisions when they’re clear.

What a Green R Conversation Looks Like

When someone shifts out of the Red R and into the Green R, things change quickly:

• They ask better questions.

• They stop reacting to myths.

• They explore options with curiosity, not fear.

• They see their home equity as a tool, not a last resort.

• They make choices that match their real goals: stability, freedom, family, dignity, and quality of life.

That’s where good decisions begin to take shape.

Why a Reverse Mortgage Loan is a Green R Tool

When used correctly, a reverse mortgage loan supports:

• Cash-flow relief

• Long-term planning

• Tax strategies

• Roth conversions

• Protecting investments in down markets

• Aging-in-place safely

• Home repair needs

• Health-care planning

• Reducing financial stress on family

• Reducing sequence-of-return risk

None of that is panic-driven.It’s intentional, steady, and strategic.

It’s the Green R.

If You Feel Like You’re in the Red R Right Now…

You’re not alone. Most people start there.

The good news? An intentional conversation can move you out of it quickly.

If you’re exploring options, facing rising costs, worried about monthly payments, helping aging parents, or simply trying to make your retirement plan more secure, I’m here to help you think it through.

No pressure. No sales pitch. No rush.

Just clarity in your Green R space.

Your home has served you well. It might be ready to help you in a new way.